Older People and Divorce

The concept of personal space and freedom of man, woman or child – for so long subjugated to wider norms and expectations of the society – has been fortified. Women have been liberated socially and economically.

Consequently, the collapse of a marriage and separation of the partners no longer raises eyebrows. Divorce has become common and accepted across all age groups – from youngsters in their twenties to mature people in their fifties and sixties.

Perhaps the most surprising aspect of <---****HYPERLINK****--->"http://www.quickie-divorce.com">Divorce is its easy acceptability and prevalence among old people who in popular imagination are thought to be seeped in the traditional values of an earlier era that upheld the sanctity of marriage and considered the marital bond as rock-solid.

So, why do old people divorce? The reasons for them are different than those of younger people because of the fundamental differences in their needs and outlook. Youngsters have generally not learnt the virtues of patience and empathy in human relationships.

They are struggling to get established in life and make progress in social status. As they rise in careers and accumulate more wealth, they overgrow their partners who seemed appropriate just a while ago and their expectations from their spouses change. They expect their husbands or wives to fit in with their new found friends and social circle.

Their divorces are often a result of infidelity – the proverbial seven-year itch. This is the age when the sex drive is at its peak, the hormones are raging and attraction to others of the opposite sex comes naturally. After some years, the spark goes out of the marriage as they get bored of seeing the same face every morning. It does not take much to enter extramarital relationships with office colleagues and file for divorce back home.

Often, being hot-blooded, the young people are unable to iron out small kinks in their marriage and, lacking perspective that comes only with age, minor differences in lifestyle and behaviour of the partner seem like huge incompatibility issues, which again lead up to divorce after some years, along with other factors.

In contrast, older people, especially in their fifties and sixties, have seen the world. They have years of experience behind them that has given them maturity and patience. Their reasons for divorce are different. One of the main factors for older men – particularly well-to-do ones – seeking divorce is their falling for a younger woman. Infidelity – of both wives and husbands – Is still the main driving force behind divorces of older people.

Many older women may divorce for money – a division of marital assets and property may end up making them millionaires, especially if their husband managed to accumulate a lot of wealth after decades of savings. Incompatibility issues, which could not be resolved till old age, are usually serious and irreconcilable and the couple may finally decide to call it a day and move on with their lives.

Compared to young couples, divorce has a different kind of impact on the lives of the older people because of their unique position. In their late forties and fifties, they are well settled in their careers and are well established in life, supported by their own social network that they have built up over the years.

They are financially secure because they have accumulated a lot of assets after working for decades. They do not have to face the financial struggle that all young couples trying to find their feet have to do. Money solves a lot of their problems. Additionally, they have no family obligations – their children would have turned into adults long ago and flown away to build their own nests.

Due to their financial muscle, maturity, social network and lack of a struggle to achieve social status, older couples usually better manage to cope with the after-effects of divorce. They do not have to bother about taking care of their already-adult children, which is a major burden off the women’s shoulders while men do not have to pay maintenance.

The social network they built over the years sustains them after separation from their partner and keeps away the dreaded feelings of boredom and loneliness, especially the fear of being left alone. With more time and money on their hands and free of all domestic fetters, they manage to improve their social lives, spend more time with friends, enter into exciting new relationships and generally be their own boss.

At their age, it is time to capitalise on a lifetime of hard work and explore new horizons.

The society as a whole in recent decades has made rapid strides in various areas, including in matters of human relationships and marriage. The rights of individuals as a social entity have been more sharply demarked and eagerly defended.

James Walsh is a freelance writer and copy editor. For more information on getting a Divorce see http://www.quickie-divorce.com

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